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Not accurate at all, but I laughed my ass off too much on seeing this NOT to post it.
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Breakfast: Kashi Go-Lean Crunch w/ almonds, cup of coffee
Lunch: 2 fried eggs, cup of tea (constant comment), Vermont Bread Company Cinnamon Raisin toast
Dinner: 2 Hot dogs (I don’t like hot dogs), macaroni salad, steamed green beans
How many of these guys worked together to create this steamy morsel? Your guess is as good as mine.
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Log Blog off to a Mushy Start!
G’d evening and welcome to The Log Blog. Surprisingly, while most of the appropriate Tumblr and Blogspot subdomain names are already taken, this blog will the first of its nature. I’ll admit, I’m sitting on the can right now writing this and, despite this being a great brainstorming locale, I can’t quite find the words to explain how I feel about my most recent matter and its storm of consequential front-to-back wipes.
One could say that its surface is soupier than this year’s Belmont Stakes was. Both the heat and duration of this poop were less than subtle. Oh how I wish I was a rodent, truly “same shit, different day” life. I swear to you that 9 times out of 10, I have picture-perfect logs. They look like different stages of a submarine diving, or surfacing, sometimes its hard to tell. Hard of course being the adjective that would LEAST DESCRIBE the attached photo.
Sure, let’s play the blame game: It was the copious amounts of Frank’s Original Hot Sauce that I used on my eggs this morning…and on my eggs/potatoes&onions/hot dog dinner, but how fast do I really digest my food? And I regularly use copious amounts of hot sauce while still being regular, so what gives? Perhaps the culprit came in the form of last night’s BEER, HMM? If I had enough to get drunk, I probably had enough to get the subsequential shits as well. Ok, so we arrived at that conclusion together; let’s move on.
One of the positive things about this website is that it promotes stool health consciousness. Riiiiight? You’re just lucky I’m keeping the pictures tame for now. You should especially thank me for omitting this one.
My promise to you is that the next stool will be firm enough to hold in one hand. I won’t, but you can.
-Mr. Stool
Bathroom humor for all; everybody matters!
